Somehow, I managed to pass out but now I can’t sleep. I woke up a few minutes ago to Steven zonked out next to me. I sat up in bed and just stared at him. He looked so peaceful. And I realized: I despise him. The lying, cheating bastard. I still feel sick to my stomach. It’s cliché, but it feels like a nightmare right now and I can’t wake up. I can’t believe my husband did this to me. It came so fast and feels so horrible. All those fucking Pilates classes to tone down for him. To look good for him. To turn him on. All I did was try, try, try! He did nothing. He’s still sleeping in bed. He’s probably dreaming about Laura. About her ankles resting on his shoulders.

He has no idea I know. He has no idea how upside down my world feels. He has no feelings towards me. He cheated on me with my best friend. I need to take a shower.